About Teaming in Game

There's a bit of a peeve rolling around in my head, and I guess if you'd like to get into the psychology of this rant, I'm probably latching onto a minor irritation to avoid dealing with some frustrating circumstances that are beyond my control elsewhere in my life.

Let me preface this with two things: first, this is purely my opinion and experience; and second, this is not aimed at anyone or any one group of people in particular, so please don't take offense. (While this was prompted by something I read elsewhere, this is in no way aimed at the author of what I read, and therefore, I won't be pointing in that direction. Reading is supposed to evoke thoughts and incite us to form our own opinions.)

When I first began playing CoH, I ran with a lot of PuGs like most people will when they start playing an MMORPG, and I was incredibly frustrated with the amount of criticism people lobbed at new players. I can remember all of one PuG that involved an experienced player taking the time to politely give advice and instruction to a new player. For the most part, however, my experience with other players was much more negative, and my frustration would lead me to shy away from teaming unless absolutely necessary until I met other players in the rp coalition we became a part of for something like a year or so.

I honestly thought the people I teamed with most were great. They knew what they were doing; they seemed to welcome others who were looking for a team; and they could work together under a decent leader. And then, things fell apart as they often do, and without going into the details of all that, I found myself playing more with a different group of players who seemed to see the game and game play in a much different light.

And then, I found out what fun really was in an MMORPG.

By example, let me share a para-phrased exchange that I had early on with one of these other players while in a respec trial reactor room during the wave attacks.

Player X: You having a good time?

Me: Yeah, I'm having a blast for the most part...

Player X: But?

Me: I have to pee as soon as this is over. It's killing me.

Player X: *laughs their ass off* Lela, go pee.

Me: Yeah? I don't want to be the reason we team wipe or anything.

Player X: Lela, this is a GAME. It's supposed to be fun. Relax, and go pee!

Yeah, folks. This conversation actually happened. My teammate announced that I was going afk to pee. And believe it or not, this was where my attitude got fully re-adjusted when it came to CoX. I have a serious need to please people, often to my own detriment, and I actually used to sit for hours on a team doing what I was 'supposed' to do in order to not let anyone down. It made me hate gameplay. I was mostly in it for the rp, and I just did my best to 'get through' the game play.

I love game play now. In fact, I prefer it a thousand times over rp. I'm so much more comfortable in my skin when I play, and I have a great time on small teams where I actually remember that it's okay to do what's comfortable instead of what makes everyone else happy. I play with people who ask "Can you try doing...." rather than yelling about screwing up aggro management or throwing absolute fits over people who spend 10 minutes in the bathroom. (I know someone who actually has some physical problems that makes that a normal thing, and they're not into advertising it. Seriously, would you want to?)

CoX became a place I could relax and just enjoy myself. I no longer sit for hours, staring at the screen, tensely trying to make sure I do everything just right so that I'm not the one that gets bitched about. I actually get to read content, chat a little while waiting for a teammate, or go ahead and get started without that teammate, knowing they're not gonna freak out on me (and if they do, they're welcome to go join another team with no hard feelings whatsoever). I can honestly say "I want to go spend a few minutes at Wentworths, so it's cool if you wanna go do something else" and I haven't insulted anyone. I've even quit mid-mission, because Caedyn needed my attention and I'd rather spend time with him. It's flipping awesome.

There's also a group of insane people that I love to team with who play on super-speed-run-through-missions-like-we're-on-crack mode. I can hardly keep up, but they've never yelled at me. I've apologized over and over when they've waited on me, and the response is always the same: No worries/Take your time. Why? Because they know it's just a game. Because debt is a badge too. Because this isn't real life. It's just a game.

This is just a rant. There's no point. I just find fault with the serious gamer attitude that people who have real lives going on around their keyboard are in some way bad players. I find fault with those who require full, written apologies/explanations from people who need to take 10 minutes for a bathroom break. Some of us are parents. Some of us have to check on that loud crashing sound that just happened outside, or the phone just rang, or any number of other things. And yeah, some of us are just plain inconsiderate.

We all pay the same amount of money to play, and I don't pay that money to stress and focus on making you happy.

And when I tried to wrap this up into a neat little point, I meandered all over the damn place, so I'm gonna leave it at that. Apologies for subjecting you to this if you actually read this far.