From the website: http://www.commercekitchen.com/whedon-ipsum/
(You can go to the url above and make your own, which is oddly addicting... )
They're just a bunch of hormonal time bombs. Who's calling me? Everybody I know lives here. It's funny how the Earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to. It was the pioneer days; people had to make their own interrogation rooms. Out of cornmeal. The living legend needs eggs! It's my estimation that every man ever got a statue made of him was one kind of sommbitch or another. Welcome to the future, where cars fly, robots serve our every whim, and genetically engineered dinosaurs rule the Earth. I recognize the council has made a decision, but given that it's a stupid-ass decision, I've elected to ignore it.
Last month he's the freak with jicama breath who waxes his back. I find it a bit sad that you think of yourself as a candidate for anyone's fantasy. I sort of met you, I mean, I watched you while you were sleeping. I mean, I was, I was present while you were unconscious, from the ice. I'm a rogue demon hunter now. What did I say to you about barging into my shuttle?
You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Hey I could whip up a love slave any day I wanted. You will keep a civil tongue in this house or we'll put your tongue in a stew. That probably would've sounded more commanding if I wasn't wearing my yummy sushi pajamas. Stay with me. Forever. That's the whole point. Frankly, it's ludicrous to have these interlocking bodies and not...interlock. If you can't do something smart, do something right.
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