The utter and sheer devastation that, no matter how careful you try to be, your emotions have gotten away from you again, and now, you have to apologize. Again.
Embarrasment at losing control. Humiliation that you couldn't make it stop. Anger at yourself for not being able to stop bursting into tears.
Resentment at 'normal' people for not even trying to control or apologize for their own emotional garbage when you have to try so damn hard.
Just another day on the emotional roller coaster ride from hell...
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